May 13th, 2017 graduation day. After the last verse of that Good Old Baylor Line everyone in the graduating class throws the last Sic’em of their college career. On that day you take pictures with your family, walk across campus for one last time, and all the nostalgia starts kicking in. It is a very emotional moment, but I don’t think you can fully grasp what it means to have graduated college. I started my professional career at EY Mexico, the pay was good, career mobility was straightforward do your job and you’ll get promoted, plenty of travelling opportunities, and the best part: it was a consulting position. For those who aren’t familiar with it. Basically you work by objectives with clients all the time, so you go from one client’s site to the other. Projects, at least in my service line, aren’t very long, four months tops. It is a very dynamic environment, you have to be able to adapt to the client’s environment in a matter of days, heck! Sometimes a matter of hours. And this is what I have learned so far.
Be humble and listen.
When you’re in school you learn your opinion is important, professors beg for you to participate in class and sometimes even give you credit for it. Discussions and debates are encouraged both inside and outside the classroom. On my very first assignment at EY, I was sent to the client’s site to make a list of minimum requirements the company needed to buy software. I remember on our kickoff meeting the Director of the project, and the manager explained to my peer and me about what we were going to be doing trough the next two months. Two things I remember from the meeting: my notebook was blank by the end of the meeting, which means I didn’t take any notes, and I stayed quiet the whole time making my peers wonder if I even spoke Spanish, since I had just moved back from Texas. I didn’t understand a word of what they were talking about. Honestly, I had no clue about software, basic IT requirements, and the business industry the client was in. I am not going to lie saying I stayed quiet because I realized I had a lot to learn from the Director and the manager who were very experienced in this field, but really because I had no contributions whatsoever as I was inexperienced. As the project went on I got familiarized with IT terms, the company and the industry and was able to contribute to the meetings. It was one of the most humbling experiences I have had in my life. I learned to stay quiet not because I wanted to but because I was playing catch up after every meeting trying to understand what just happened. I learned that although sometimes you want to share a lot, it is okay to stay quiet. I found myself learning more through paying attention to my coworkers and asking the right questions when I had doubts, than trying to voice my opinion every chance I had.
Times does fly
In college I felt most of the time, I was making good use of my time, I was either studying, working out, working or participating on campus events. Coming back from work is different than coming back from school, some days I had to keep working at home and some days you’re just too tired to do anything. When I graduated, I told myself I was going to “rest” for six months, and then I would go back to hit the books, start applying for grad school, and get my CFA. Long story short it has been a year and five months and I am still “resting” from studying. It is kind of embarrassing honestly, because I had only read one book since I graduated college. I am getting back into the habit of reading, and in the past month I have already finished two books. I hope I can continue with that habit for the rest of the year. What I am trying to say is that no matter how much you enjoy your job, or like your coworkers it is so easy to get caught up in a hectic lifestyle. We often times forget our long term goals and things that can enrich us as a person. Call it volunteering, travelling, reading, working on new projects, or starting a business. Don’t let one year and five months pass by to realize you haven’t done much outside your daily job.
Lastly, what people say about us is really not that important
At Baylor I cared a lot about what people around me might think, and where I stood compared to my peers. In college it felt as if, you had a boyfriend you had to get a ring by spring before graduating. Well that was not the case when I came back home to Mexico City. In contrast to most places in the US, Mexicans feel like there is an obligation to voice an opinion whenever we feel someone is not doing things right, we do not mean to be rude, it is just how we are raised. I am 23 years old, and I got engaged with my best friend last year. Mostly everyone I’ve met in the past year has made a comment about my engagement. They misinterpret my engagement ring as a sign that spells: I am too young to get married, I NEED ADVICE. This is how it usually goes. I’ll call this person Jose.
Jose: OMG you’re engaged?!
Karen: Yes!
Jose: When did you get engaged?
Karen: In June, 2017
Jose: Annnnd, how old are you?
By this point I know where the conversation is going, and honestly I stop listening.
Karen: I am 23.
Jose: you’re so young! And what do your parents think about it? But, don’t you want to live more?
Then they proceed to tell me a story about their first divorce, and how they should’ve listened to their parents, or how much fun they had in their twenties because they were single, or make a comment about how they are older than me and don’t want to get married yet, because they want to enjoy life, and it ends with the dreaded: You’re too young to get married, you should wait. Or some variation of this conversation, but you get the point. It got to the point where I hid my ring under my sleeve to avoid this awkward conversation whenever I met a new person. All I did was shake my head in agreement to avoid giving explanations of any kind. It took many of these conversations to understand why people where meddling in my relationship, and in my decisions, for me to come up with the conclusion that we cannot change what people think about us and what they say to us. And that is okay, because it really does not matter. In college you’re not really making life changing decisions, and you have your parents to rely on whenever you screw up, either fail a class or run out of money. Well, not anymore. This is the time when we have to start making our own decisions, because you are the only one who is going to have to deal with the consequences of your actions. Once I embraced this truth and tried to live by it, I realized that you aren’t here to please the world. I have to make my own choices, and think about how these decisions are going to affect me in the long run, if I like the answer then I have to go for it. I am not going to lie it still bothers me when people make comments about my engagement, but I don’t think too much of it.
I hope you find this read enjoyable, and maybe agree with me. I would love to hear about your experiences after graduation, it is so good to know what everyone else is going through!
Finding My Purpose 